Redefining Asian Masculinity

This video that I am about to share struck me in such a profound way that I find myself watching it over and over again. Because it helps me remember what is important and who I really am, buried deep inside. When I first watched it, I cried. It was like him speaking directly into my soul. Even though I have never met this man, it seems like we have been walking along the same path. The path of an Asian man trying to find himself in a western world and their arrogant stereotypes about us. Growing up in a western first world country, I had to deal with so much ignorance and rejection just because I am Asian and not white, it made me so bitter and angry. "I am not attracted to Asian guys" "Ching Chang Chong" "Asians have small penises" Hah, who here hasn't heard these before? God, I was so angry. I went to the gym and did kickboxing so that no one could hurt me ever again. And I raged, and raged and raged.

But deep down inside, I knew that this couldnt be it. This couldnt be all that life has to offer. And I was looking for ways to find happiness. I was lucky to have met a few men and women along the way who helped me heal, bit by bit. Still, these people were all white and even though I feel very grateful towards them, I still felt alone. Then I saw this video of Kevin Kreider and it was like watching myself in the mirror.

Finally, I was not alone anymore. And there is strength in numbers. So without further ado, here is the video I am talking about. Some people will find this rubbish because they have made different experiences in life and that is okay. But to all the troubled brothers out there, this is for you. You are not alone and I hope this video helps you a bit in your own path of life.

To be honest, I don't think I have ever felt less masculine.

I guess due to stereotypes, people have this image of an Asian guy and what they are generally like. I'm not excessively tall but I do tend to tower over many guys I meet on a day to day basis. I also grow a short beard nowadays and I guess I have somewhat of a cold stare that in my own opinion, I at times feel somewhat intimidating to some people. I'm one of those Asians that actually like the way my eyes actually look and I feel like that actually makes me somewhat unique and generally respected.

Tho I have met people who were blatantly rude or hostile in my life. Generally, I feel like the Asian stereotypes mostly help me as the discrepancy of me vs it, is large. I don't know - obviously racism is bad but you can't have it perfect in everything and I feel some people try to blame it all too excessively on one department and overvalue its significance.

TigerfromSpace wrote: This video that I am about to share struck me in such a profound way that I find myself watching it over and over again. Because it helps me remember what is important and who I really am, buried deep inside. When I first watched it, I cried. It was like him speaking directly into my soul. Even though I have never met this man, it seems like we have been walking along the same path. The path of an Asian man trying to find himself in a western world and their arrogant stereotypes about us. Growing up in a western first world country, I had to deal with so much ignorance and rejection just because I am Asian and not white, it made me so bitter and angry. "I am not attracted to Asian guys" "Ching Chang Chong" "Asians have small penises" Hah, who here hasn't heard these before? God, I was so angry. I went to the gym and did kickboxing so that no one could hurt me ever again. And I raged, and raged and raged.

But deep down inside, I knew that this couldnt be it. This couldnt be all that life has to offer. And I was looking for ways to find happiness. I was lucky to have met a few men and women along the way who helped me heal, bit by bit. Still, these people were all white and even though I feel very grateful towards them, I still felt alone. Then I saw this video of Kevin Kreider and it was like watching myself in the mirror.

Finally, I was not alone anymore. And there is strength in numbers. So without further ado, here is the video I am talking about. Some people will find this rubbish because they have made different experiences in life and that is okay. But to all the troubled brothers out there, this is for you. You are not alone and I hope this video helps you a bit in your own path of life.

Thanks for sharing this beautiful video, I am not an Asian man but I know some that hate themselves and feel they have to wear a mask to fit in..I think it is sad,when someone hates themselves so much that they hide themselves away,locking up their emotions and true feelings,Repressing a lot of pain and self doubt.I think this video would be helpful for a lot of guys on here.Some think such videos are garbage maybe,but i think its due to being ashamed,like watching this makes them a stupid person and makes them feel worse about themselves,but watching such videos, are not a sign of weakness but of great strength.

People are people, I have struggled with similar issues,comparing myself to other people,hating myself,even though i am not Asian, white people do this to..I also seen a lot of mean people bullying Asian people and it is so heartbreaking, I cannot imagine what it truly like to feel like an outcast due to race..It is really sad to hear about people of different people of different races suffering from such adversity..I grew up in a very diverse community, we had every race possible where I grew up in Chicago. My mom thankfully taught me how to accept other cultures and beliefs..So,racism was never an issue..She taught me that a persons character and actions and their heart is more important..

Sadly such adversity does exist and some people will not be so kind or accepting..It is truly just human nature for people to reject things and people that they do not understand..I have always admired Asians actually. I think there are a lot of ignorant people in this world, I think that is why it is important to be your own best friend and have only people in your life who accept you for who you truly are,regardless of faults.Those who also know how to forgive you,even when you mess up,but still hold you accountable for actions...

I think this is a good lesson to learn,To love and accept yourself first and everything else will fall into place,regardless of what anyone else says or thinks..The fact you admitted you cried? Not to put you on the spot, shows you are human and have emotions..I find it an admirable quality when a person can show they have emotions and even certain vulnerabilities, instead of repressing it and hating themselves..I am also learning similar lessons.. Anyways,did not mean to distract from the message.But thank you for being honest and sharing this moment and this video with others..Very encouraging..You never know who will be helped by your post..Also sharing the courage to show your human despite hardships. Wish you a nice day..

Wow, that was a powerful video to watch. I feel you, it must be really freaking tough for any of you going through anything like what the speaker went through. I really do think that if women view any man as less then masculine based upon stereotypical western cultural 'traits' then shame on them. Diversity between races, religions and concepts of sexuality based upon sex and gender is what makes us all unique. Any woman would be a fool not to explore more then what she is 'taught' to like.

"Masculinity" is just being comfortable in your skin. In a culture that embraces aggression, such comfort may entail having physical power, or prowess.

No idea what he is talking about. Want to be white? Do you white men very weak. White men use Asian philosophy to get over their pain. Getting in relationship with a western women is not always a pleasure.
I never wanted be white. The guy does not understand online dating ideal for most men.

^whilst i dont align to his newfound revelation towards life, i think you should watch the video again. the wanting to be white was just a stepping stone on his overall journey. it has little relevance towards his overall message.