Do You Think The United States Is Open To Asian Men?

Summerbreeze wrote: Donovan01

America is racist, no one said that it wasn't. Porn influences men not women. Women are still seeking someone to love them.

The top is U.S. open to Asian men? what does porn have to do with that answer?

Too many guys are looking just to hook up and when they get turned down think it is because of their identity. Quality women want a relationship not to be a booty call. But I am sure there are women that don't mind that type of relationship, but it probably involves a more materialistic relationship. You want sex out of the transaction they need something too, purses, cars, cash, vacations etc.

Good that as a White woman in America, you agree that it's a racist country.

Porn influences men and not women? I absolutely disagree and I have evidence to back it up. Believe me, women probably watch porn just as much as men do now. If you watch porn (doesn't sound like you do), you'll know what I mean. A lot of it now is explicitly geared towards women, probably not 100% but you could tell the content producers are making an explicit effort to target women with content in the last 5-10 years - again that's what I was referring to with the BBC porn. Nothing wrong with that, I like that they are doing so. That hyper-masculine porn was getting really stale.

I sort of agree with you on your hookup culture take, but that's the environment we're in. I don't explicitly go around looking for hookups but I also want to test out a car before I buy it. A lot of Asian chicks have matched with me on Tinder in Asia - beautiful women. But they say stuff like "dating for marriage." lol i'm like ok...well... can I/we at least get some action in before I propose? This ain't 1776, it's 2024.

Starvewolf wrote:

Summerbreeze wrote: Donovan01

America is racist, no one said that it wasn't. Porn influences men not women. Women are still seeking someone to love them.

The top is U.S. open to Asian men? what does porn have to do with that answer?

Too many guys are looking just to hook up and when they get turned down think it is because of their identity. Quality women want a relationship not to be a booty call. But I am sure there are women that don't mind that type of relationship, but it probably involves a more materialistic relationship. You want sex out of the transaction they need something too, purses, cars, cash, vacations etc.

100% I do noticed some Asian guys likes to blame their racial identity altogether,instead of themselves individually. Typically playing the victim mindset.

Like : oh she turned me down, they must be racist towards my entire race of people !

Like come on, if it’s you, it’s you, it won’t change even if you turned into a white or black boy overnight. Some girls didn’t leave or reject a guy because their skin colour , it’s the colour inside them !

Get that straight

Everyone plays the race card in one way or another. But that's not the point. First off, you don't even live in the US. I'm speaking of the situation in the US. I've had personal experiences where white girls have told me to my face they didn't want to bring me home to their parents because "they don't like Asians" (that's a literal quote from a girl who has told me that straight to me face when I was much younger). It may be that you haven't experienced this in Germany but this is very real in the US. You could easily replace "Asians" with another race. Racism is still very strong in America.

When someone rejects you based on race, most of the times they won't say "oh it's because you're identity is X, Y, Z." If you need someone to spell it out for you that it could be your identity, then maybe that is the problem for you lol. I'm not saying your identity is always the culprit but if you ignore it as a factor in at least SOME of the negative experiences (like, oh, I don't know, in the EXPLICIT example I provided in the previous paragraph), then you're just doing the classic "hear no evil, see no evil," which leads to my last paragraph below...

Asians love to downplay hardship to appear strong, it's a typical thing we do, so I get your psychology. But again, if you're in America (I can't speak about Europe because I have never been there, let alone know the dating situation there) and you're telling me Asian men have been found in research studies to get dramatically less dates than other races of men on Tinder and etc. and that's just due to "oh geez pure statistical error or just bad luck oh well!" then you're, again, just downplaying hardship to appear strong. Ignoring the problem won't make it go away. I'm not even stating that there is a remedy to this problem but the problem does exist, it is a fact that's been researched. The first step to fixing a problem is to ACKNOWLEDGE that there is a problem. To reiterate my point from the 2nd paragraph, if you cover your eyes and ears, it doesn't mean that reality just goes away.

^ well I’m sorry you had that misfortune in your dating history in US. If they racist, then they are , they are not the people you take home with.

Guess who else can be racist ? Every other race of people. Asian people even hate each other within their own race. Chinese and Taiwanese ? Yes. North Korea and South Korea ? Yes.

Is it a problem? Maybe , is it for us to fix ? I don’t think so.

How many girls that wanted to match up with me ? 4 digits onwards . From north hemisphere to south, left to right and Too to bottom. This number easily beat 95% of the guys on the dating market. It doesn’t matter what colour of men they are , they just can’t easily have this number.
And The last 5% of the guys that can have better number than this ,will still gonna come to girls that going to reject them for whatever reasons they may have . And So would I .

You just can’t win everyone over, and that’s fine. You only take 1 girl home at a time, if you take 2 girls together, they will take you to hospital lol

Summerbreeze wrote: GET IT Starvewolf!
If I knew how to add gif or a cool picture I would add one here cheering you on.

In the breakroom at work, the lady was complaining asking where the good guys can be found and that there are none left. There are plenty of good guys don't blame all the good guys because you made the mistake picking a loser.
And it is her! She is the problem she complains about everything. She is so sour I had to find a different breakroom on a different hallway just to avoid her.

Don't lie to yourself you want to be part of the hookup culture then don't complain that you don't get wife material. Can't have it both ways.

We used to have some ladies here , they will try to bring their misfortune on everyone else. Like a guy did her wrong , then try to make the rest of guys be blamed and responsible for the mistake one guy did

It seems a lot of the problem is miscommunication.

1. if the guy is looking for a hook up only then state that from the beginning. Don't say you are looking for marriage but really you want to hook up and "if you fall in love" then marriage. Because he is already going in not considering marriage.
That lets the woman decided okay does she just want to enjoy dating this guy with out marriage in mind. And that is okay but don't bait and switch.

2. Women too. Don't think that you are going to give him all you got and he is going to marry you. Don't give him wife duties and you think he is going to magically changed into some amazing loving husband after you give him sex.

Just like Donovan said he wants to test drive the car.

Any man will drive a free ford focus, but he isn't going to go out and buy a ford focus. And he will tell all his friends he is driving a ford because it is free. Only value it has is the free price tag! But when he goes and spends his hard earn money on a Lexus, he will drive it everywhere, no food inside etc. It has value because he had to work for it, he spends his money on it. He made a commitment buying that car before driving it.

So, guys be up front. Girls turning you down because you are looking for a hook up. Then you are asking the wrong ones. Don't be mad at that. Make it clear, you are single and looking to date and that is fine.

Girls when you have sex the growth of the relationship is done. Kind of like the diploma. You have certified that you are happy with everything he is doing and done up to that point. Don't get mad that he doesn't do better or change when you give him that reward.

Where does my advice come from. Two failed choices. I married two losers. Two guys happy to drive before they buy. They didn't have to work hard, and I thought the better I was the more I did the happier they would be the better they would treat me.

I was the problem I let those two losers in my life, but why did I let losers in my life. I joined counseling and after 2 years I assure you this is solid advice.

Men and women operate differently.

If you are the hook up culture, then don't blame wife material for not hooking up with you. And if you are in the hook up culture don't stand behind the lie of looking for marriage. Be upfront Be Leonardo Dicaprio and live your best life.

Women know that once you give in to sex, he will not change like a magic wand he will be frozen in what every maturity level, behavioral, love actions, love language all of it. He will be that. Because with sex you have given your approval of him.

Long post, but I hope this helps someone

Donovan01 wrote: I've had personal experiences where white girls have told me to my face they didn't want to bring me home to their parents because "they don't like Asians" (that's a literal quote from a girl who has told me that straight to me face when I was much younger).

if a girl i was dating was to tell me that, my impression wouldn't be, oh *insert country* sure is racist. i wouldn't even think about the racism (whether it's apparent or not). and this is not downplaying racism, ignoring it exists or whatever. it's simply of no consequence. i could probably find another asian guy in the US in this specific scenario, but the polar opposite.

the problem is youre overblowing and twisting this "problem" of asian men not getting dates, and concluding it as america hates asian men.

a little off topic. i talk to this "asian girl" living in the US on another platform. all she talks about is race, and how she thinks asian men are inferior. some of the things she says is so ridiculous and comical. i feel like i'm getting trolled by the same people. i have asian friends and family in the US, and none of them have this inferiority complex. going by that, i like to believe it's only a small percentage of asians in the US who feel this way. exacerbated by online anonymity.

I’m with Mari on this one , “why limit yourself when you can hate everyone”?

Chinese people hates far too many, Vietnam , Philippines, korea , Japan, US , India , sometimes Europe, and let’s not forget HK and Taiwan.

In fact, In mainland China , Chinese people also hate each other. the northern vs southern, the workers vs owners . The Rich vs Poor , the beautiful vs ugly . Don’t they sound like those Americans some people labeled them as racist?

Oh if for any reason some of you haven’t learned , white hates other whites too. Surprised right ?

hmm I don't hate people, but behaviors.

But behaviors that I hate
People that don't answer the same questions that they ask others.
I hate people that blow their nose over food.
I hate complainers, whinners,
People that poke holes in solutions, but don't have a solution to suggest
I hate people that "need" to break during work. Let's bust our ass then be done.
People that throw their trash out the window.
People that spit gum on the ground.
Guys that don't take out the garbage
Guys that can't get dirty or break a sweat
Girls with high pitched voices
Girls that sound like babies
Baby talk
Guys that sit at the table waiting to be served which ironically if I love you, I am happy to serve you but at the same time I am not your servant....
Any brand hot mustard that is not the WY brand
Waking up late or wasting time sitting in the hotel room on vacation (yes, I wake up early and want to do it all!)
People that cut in line
Small noses... I know this one is weird...
People that rather make excuses for their behaviors
People that don't wash their hands after using the restroom
People that put food down in random places in the store instead of the spot they picked it up from.


These are some of the reasons I would not date a person regardless of their skin color or ethnicity.
Plenty of times we get turned down or ghosted because of our personal habits. I know my personal habits are very hard for others to handle, but I am also happily single, so I don't plan on changing.

^ chill sis, me and some here definitely not arrogant enough to group you together with other people’s guilt. Some of us here known each other for as long as this page was alive.

I also have friends in US. Not once they cry to me about being bullied or being disrespected to.

You guys deserve credit, because I can’t think of a second place in this world that’s generous enough , to cast a person of different skin colour , to movies as a lead ,in a white dominated country.

China , Vietnam , North Korea cast a white guy as lead, kicking everyone’s butt ? Then come out a hero ? Don’t think so .
Cast white guys as the mean , disrespectful, dishonest, racist piece of 💩？ I’d put my money to that 🥴

Starvewolf wrote:

You guys deserve credit, because I can’t think of a second place in this world that’s generous enough , to cast a person of different skin colour , to movies as a lead ,in a white dominated country.

That's mainly because the U.S. is a strongly capitalistic society. Anything that will make money can be made into a movie.