Question about marriage.

I would have to say that marriage is an ancient path to exclusivity that millions of couples decide to follow to show their commitment to their continued and happy relationship. The idea and practice of marriage has stand the test of time and have evolved in several of forms in different cultures.

However, I think marriage will continue to exist but in different form as social dynamics and relationships continue to evolve to changes in other exogenous factors (e.g. socio-economics, social media & technology, demographic shift/changes, social attitudes/norms).

The perception on the current state of marriages will have to change in order for it to survive. These social changes can range from, allowing men to share parenting duties (e.g. men work at home and take care of kids) to getting married at 30+ years old without being discriminated by peers (i.e. allowing more time to find the perfect partner in order to secure the financial resources to start a family).

If shit hits the fan in the next couple of decades because everyone turned out single because no one can find their ideal mate, then everyone should follow biomimicry and copy what penguins do since they seem to have no trouble finding their mates:



Of course, if all else fails, then we're doomed for extinction! dating didn't work out for this unlucky penguin:



I think that suicidal penguin should have signed up to Plenty of Fish, since that seems to be the next logical step for single penguins.

Marriage is only as important as you make it. For many, its crystalizing a relationship. Because of the level of commitment needed (physical, emotional, financial etc), it gives assurance to each other that you're serious about one another. Its like how being "in a relationship" gives more assurance and security than just "seeing someone" or "being f**k buddies".

Sure you can get divorced, but if you get married already prepared to get divorced, dont get married. If you see it as just a piece of paper, dont get married.

My parents were never paper married. However, they've lived together for many years and have four kids.

I don't see myself getting married anytime soon. I would maybe like to settle down someday, but it doesn't even have to be technically marriage, as long as the relationship is strong enough.
Marriage can end quickly just like any other relationship..

I want to be married because its a sign of commitment. What is life without commitment? If you're not committed to something or someone, you can leave anytime you want. Having commitment means putting in the effort even if you don't want to sometimes. To me, its an ultimate sacrifice and proves that you are willing to give up a huge part of your life just to be with someone, and they do the same as well. The problem isn't marriage, but the lack of commitment from young adults that rush into marriage.

I partly agree with the OP.. Marriage isn't necessary to have a strong connection and loving relationship.. Not being married doesn't mean you love your partner any less either..
But if you're really sure about someone, why not marry them?
It's an act that tells your partner how serious you are about them and that even if 50% of the married couples are getting divorced, you still believe you won't be one of them!

I also find the idea of calling someone "my husband" instead of boyfriend quite charming thehe ^_^

Vesna wrote: Why do you people want to get married so badly?
Why does that piece of paper mean so much to you?

I have hard time understanding the whole thing so please explain.

I understand where you're coming from.

My fiance and I have been living together for the past 9 months and we are practically married. We live the lifestyle of a husband and wife. The good and the bad. It's not always easy. It takes sacrifices, commitment, compromises, understanding and sooo much more.

So what difference will a piece of paper make to our lives now? Not much difference really but it IS something we want very soon. To be married and start our family.

Vesna wrote: Why do you people want to get married so badly?
Why does that piece of paper mean so much to you?

I have hard time understanding the whole thing so please explain.

I know where you're coming from too.

Marriage used to be about love and religion or something.
Now it's just a piece of paper that the government oversees.

But for me even though I'm not ready to be married, I would want that piece of paper just so for the sake of LOVE.

I was married once. A real long time ago. Back in 94.

Marriage is cosidered there, these days, more like a form of protection for the unborn child or that child that will appear in the future, cause of the advantages, the legal advantages that marriage gives to the kid, at least in my country. so that is why i heard many couple wanting to marry just for that.
some others think that marriage is just of piece of paper...and it's better without it, considering the high number of divorces.


i may be old fashioned, but i think about marriage like it was before, when you married just cause you loved your other half so much that you want to officialize it, the meaning of the ring and the meaning of the words you say...

i still see those couples that still marry cause of love... maybe i am dreaming too much sigh

Sets the relationship in stone. Marriage is important in many a religious tradition/practice and is recognized by the Fed. Marriage is a big thing. Why do you think millions of Americans (gay and straight alike) helped to influence the decision for the US Supreme Court to declare a key section of DOMA unconstitutional?