Heyai meet up in Toronto 4/2-4/5

Don't assume to know me San Ichiban. You only assume I'm staying for romantic reasons?
I agree with you that Hey-ai is a good place to make friends.

I already can tell that your meetups are primed for friendship. Which is ironic. Prime-c doesn't trust the guys that join dating sites and mostly want to get laid lol. I would say they're at least honest about it. How lame would it be for single guys to go to meetups and pretend they're not really interested in romantic pursuits and cool in being friend-zoned?

However people put on a face when they first meet people. How does a pretty girl know that the guy being nice to her, isn't pretending. Or how a rich man knows that pretty little thing isn't with him because of his money? Trust is something that's hard to come by in superficial romantic contexts and it would be naive to think that guys don't go to meetups and most be all nice and respectful and be so happy to not get laid.

I have been to meetups. After high school, had less and less contact with close friends and living in new places where I didn't know anyone. So after my mid-twenties, I joined a few. And I also dated and it was cool. But one thing I learned was that it becomes always awkward or even violent if you break up with someone after knowing them under the mask and only to return to the same group every week. That was only ever actually a problem with close-knit small groups. I guess the expression - you don't sh*t where you eat, would be the moral of it all.

This dating site is flawed in that everyone seems to know everyone. That was my original impression when I first came here and that never changed. Not a good model for uninhibited interactions and why this hey-ai site time is limited.

I may never been to any of your meetups but my impression is that there there seem to be smallish close knit groups who have been here for ages and so if I wanted to date someone - I wouldn't join your meetup and make tight friends for a lengthy period to later on date a friend. Girls friend-zone to avoid the complications for a reason.

Uh, what? Like what Prime_c said, you don't attend these events with the intent to get laid but to mingle and interact with people. What is wrong with just meeting new people? It's actually more creepy if you attend any meets up in general with the sole intent of getting laid. I for one don't know anyone going to this event but as someone who lives in Toronto, I would've gladly attended this event as a tour guide to show off this amazing city. Guess that makes me lame or fake for wanting to go without wanting to get laid.

Have fun! Be safe Corona virus.

tedstocks wrote: Uh, what? Like what Prime_c said, you don't attend these events with the intent to get laid but to mingle and interact with people. What is wrong with just meeting new people? It's actually more creepy if you attend any meets up in general with the sole intent of getting laid. I for one don't know anyone going to this event but as someone who lives in Toronto, I would've gladly attended this event as a tour guide to show off this amazing city. Guess that makes me lame or fake for wanting to go without wanting to get laid.

I think I understand how a meetup works and how you should conduct yourself at one. I was only speaking from my experience and observations with meetups. You missed my whole point but maybe I failed to explain it well but was only talking to prime-c and san ichiban.

First off, got zero interest in dating on hey-ai but just here to occasionally argue on the forums and talk with my pen-pals. That's all.

I was on this site about 2 years ago when I was single and saw a girl that I really liked. Even talked to her for a while - Introduced myself by throwing jokes at her way and she told me that I was real exceptional and that she don't usually respond to others but mostly to me because I was different. Then she left. Like a fool, I actually stuck around hoping that she'll come back but she didn't. Looking back I realized that I had no idea if she was ever real and if she was, she was just enjoying the attention that many guys here give her and wearing "fake" mask.

I have led girls on and been led. Looking back - that never ends meaningfully. I gave up investing in 1 way or mutual LDR romance online a long time ago but only here for penpalship or friends only.

The one thing I didn't regret here was some of the female members here. I had nice interesting conversations where I could talk freely. If any of those members say they be at the meetup. I would seriously consider going. Tho to be honest, I be much more likely to just visit them directly in their hometown and not have to deal with odd strangers at a meat up.

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Speaking of which, I agree that meetups are great for making friends and ironically that is where I see the sole problem area TedStocks.

However you almost sound like someone who has not gone through a messy breakup.
If so, imagine having a girlfriend. Who was introduced to you in a blind date by your friends. And she's actually close friends or blood relatives with your friends. And over time, you realize that she is not what you are looking for. But if you break up with her, her relatives and your friends will get mad at you and tell you to go f"ck yourself for wasting her time. Like seriously?

That's an actual reality that I was pointing out.

My only point is that obviously at a meetup. People are strangers and not always honest upfront. Guys can be deceptive pigs and girls can be deceptive pigs too. When you learn the hard way they are not right for you as you later know them better - common reality is you will also lose existing friends because of the consequent breakup as typically people choose sides. One has to consider the real possibility of break-up. Yep they do exist in reality. :gasp: Some are mature and stay as friends but more often than not - breakups just ends badly. And afterwards neither can return to the meetup together and not be awkward or civil about it.

That is kinda why a typical adult loses eight friends when a long-term relationship ends.

And breakups wouldn't be a problem if the meetups has many constantly new faces and lots of people - over 100. And that is quite the opposite of what hey-ai meetups seem to me. Nothing wrong with meeting new people but don't date too closely to friends because you may end up losing many interconnected friends after a break-up. so if you go to a meet-up - you do have to prioritize on either friends or "possibly" complicate it with romance. And if you want romance, then be prepared to say goodbye to the friends. That's was all I'm saying mate.

www.grownups.co.nz/h...-friends-break/

All I know is that you are ruining this thread with your negative argument. If you have nothing good to say, please let others enjoy the idea of ​​meeting and all.
No one asked you about your bad experience in dating and if you wanna share your stories go and open a thread about it but again. Stop it.


A simple warn. Dogface.

Hazmat suit mandatory at this point.

Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiittttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt a minute. @Dogface9............. When did Prime_C say "he was only here to get laid?", and I think you have made a lot of assumptions about people in my opinion.

PunaniPunch wrote: Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiittttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt a minute. @Dogface9............. When did Prime_C say "he was only here to get laid?", and I think you have made a lot of assumptions about people in my opinion.

Maybe you're right. I've never been to any hey-ai meetups so there's probably alot I need to learn and not judge too quickly.

Ironically you also made assumptions that aren't correct. - I was saying that when it comes to meetups - prime-c directly told me that guys with core intention to get laid, shouldn't be at meetups since they are there for the wrong intentions. It's only ironic as if you don't trust guys that join dating sites or romantic themed meetups whom hope to mostly get laid - that's basically like most guys. ^^

And you accidentally misread it - I wasn't even referring to him wanting to get laid - but at the (guys that join dating sites and mostly want to get laid lol.)

I guess you are right, and I mean, there will always be people thinking to show up to get laid to any type of event. Think of a night club. BUT again, its the woman's choice, and they can withdraw consent at any time.